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The Story of The Chinese Farmer

Carroll Macey


The Story of the Chinese Farmer: Embracing the Wisdom of “Maybe”

The story of the Chinese Farmer is a profound parable that has resonated with countless people seeking peace amidst life’s uncertainties. It’s a tale that challenges our instinct to label experiences as “good” or “bad,” encouraging instead a mindset of openness and curiosity.

For those unfamiliar, here’s the story:

Once upon a time, there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, the neighbors gathered to commiserate. “Such bad luck,” they said.The farmer replied, “Maybe.”The next day, the horse returned, bringing with it seven wild horses. The neighbors came to celebrate. “Such good fortune,” they said.The farmer replied, “Maybe.”The following day, the farmer’s son tried to ride one of the wild horses, was thrown off, and broke his leg. The neighbors came again, offering sympathy for the farmer’s misfortune.The farmer replied, “Maybe.”The next day, the army came to recruit young men for war. Seeing the son’s broken leg, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on his good luck.The farmer replied, “Maybe.”

The story’s wisdom lies in its simplicity. We are reminded that life is rarely as straightforward as it seems. A perceived setback may lead to unexpected opportunities, while what we initially celebrate may carry unseen challenges.


Applying the Story in Real Life

I often share this story with my clients when they’re navigating moments of uncertainty or distress, as it helps to reframe how they approach life’s inevitable ups and downs. One client’s experience with redundancy comes to mind—a story that aligns so closely with the parable, it feels worth sharing.


Let’s call him Mark. He had been in his role for over a decade when, out of the blue, his position was made redundant. At first, the news felt catastrophic. Mark had a family to support and was deeply tied to his identity as a provider. “Such bad luck,” he said to me during one of our sessions, echoing the words of the farmer’s neighbors.


I encouraged Mark to explore the possibility of “maybe.” What if this wasn’t the end but a turning point? Over the next few months, Mark began to reconnect with hobbies he had shelved for years, including woodworking. To his surprise, what started as a therapeutic outlet turned into a business opportunity.


Today, Mark runs a successful bespoke furniture company, a path he would never have imagined if redundancy hadn’t forced him to pause. What felt devastating in the moment became a springboard for a more fulfilling chapter.


My Personal Experience

This parable has also served me well. I vividly recall a moment when a coaching project I had poured my heart into didn’t materialise. At the time, it felt like a significant professional failure. Yet, as I leaned into the wisdom of “maybe,” I noticed how this supposed failure freed up space for an unexpected opportunity.


A new client, who came through an entirely unrelated referral, invited me to work with their leadership team. This turned out to be one of the most rewarding collaborations of my career, offering me deeper insights into collective growth and change than I had ever experienced before.


Had that original project succeeded, I may never have had the capacity for this opportunity. The lesson, as always, was to embrace the unfolding of events with curiosity rather than judgment.


How You Can Use the Story

The next time you’re faced with a challenge—or even an unexpected success—pause for a moment. What if you approached it with “maybe”? How might this perspective help you find the courage to navigate uncertainty, remain present, and trust in life’s unfolding?


This mindset isn’t about bypassing emotions or denying the realities of struggle. It’s about holding space for the possibility that we don’t always see the bigger picture. Life’s narrative is constantly evolving, and as the story of the Chinese Farmer reminds us, today’s “bad” might be tomorrow’s “good” (or vice versa).


Sometimes, when we release the need to define outcomes, we create space for opportunities to surprise us. As one of my clients beautifully put it, “I’ve stopped chasing certainty and started chasing curiosity.”

And that, perhaps, is the most liberating lesson of all.


The whole process of nature is an integrated process of immense complexity, and it’s really impossible to tell whether anything that happens in it is good or bad — because you never know what will be the consequence of the misfortune; or, you never know what will be the consequences of good fortune.

Alan Watts


So when you are consumed with frustration and disappointment , take a breath, ground and take time to reframe your perspective to "Maybe...."


Rethinking leadership means managing your mind set, connecting to yourself and others and being a full expression of who you are. Here’s to those of us redefining what it means to lead—let’s keep rethinking leadership together.





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